Some Questions I Seek Answers For...

Have you ever tried to help people? If you have, have you ever had tomatoes thrown at you by the same people who wanted help? If not, can you tell me how you help people out because my methods clearly don't work!

Me trying to help is often like being alone at sea. Calm for a while, roaring waters later on.

 Time and again, one distraught friend after another has asked me for advise simply because I was the only one present. As an individual, I usually stay away from conflict creation but inevitably find myself at the heart of conflict resolution. Even after wishing to not be in a situation, I end up being in one.

Though this isn't a comment about all my attempts at relationships with boys, this is a view of how terribly I need to learn how to be a more diplomatic person rather than a caregiver.

I have mentioned before that I have made attempts at mending relations between friends who had love troubles, friends who needed an ear to relieve their problems, parents who needed to vent, and teachers who tried hard to change me. As a result of being a confidante for many friends and family, I have all these jumbled up stories in my memory palace. I'm not a fan of gossip in the way Kim Kardashian is dating Kanye now. Nor do I like tales of who's sleeping with whom and how many times. But I do get to hear such stories against my will.

And this is why I need to learn how to develop it the other way round.

I want to tell a friend that she's making a terrible mistake by dating a guy who cheats on her. I want to be able to smack this guy's face, leave a print of my palm on his bony face, and make her realize that he is not the one she's been told to believe is the Mr. Right. She needs to know and understand that I don't want her to waste her time on a futile romance when it holds no future and is based on the idea of "settling down because there's no one else right now."

I also want to tell a hopeless romantic friend that her day will come. Till then she needs to be strong and face all oppositions. Most importantly, she needs to stand strong. She needs to believe in fate and stars if she wants to. She needs to believe in God or a higher power, if that gives her solace. There is someone out there for her is the advise she gets. However, what I want her to believe in instead is that she is a one-of-a-kind gem. I'd love to make her realize that I'm proud of having her as a friend and that all that's happened is in the past. (No amount of cyber-stalking will help her cause.) Till her day comes, I want her to know that she'll have friends like me to support her in any way. And that I love her.

To two of the first people I ever met, I want to tell them that they're together for more than just two reasons: my brother and I. I wish I could make them realise that I would love them more if they made an attempt to understand each other instead of giving in to traditional roles and expectations. Every time a situation arises, I wish they'd talk to each other instead of letting feelings and thoughts fester inside them. In this case though, sometimes I think I need "Age" more than the acquired "Wisdom" to settle them down.

I want to tell someone that I don't love them and have never done so. What happened was idiotic and a mistake. How could I correct it? I don't have a time machine and even that we know doesn't work. (The Time Machine and Big Bang Theory tell us so.) How do I tell this person that I don't require their attention? That I have a life I love which doesn't include them. How do I let this person down easy? How do I prevent them from not being sad?

Looking for answers...

I'd like to tell the world that I need to meet more like-minded people. Why won't you send such people my way? Why do I have to deal with people who don't understand my jokes, who can't help me increase my knowledge, who let me down by being too normal? Why are people I enjoy spending time with so far and away, scattered across the globe? Being one in a crowd is not so fun if you have to stoop down to the level of others. And attempts at making them rise above themselves is always met with derision. Why aren't there any songs about this? I guess if there were songs for this, they wouldn't understand.

These are some of the questions I wanted to get out of the way and into the universe. Universe, now it's your turn to handle them. Of course I need answers. Answers that don't require me going to a remote monastery in the Himalayan mountains and meditating for days. Answers that can be worked upon together, that is, if I don't piss off the people above.